the courage to wander into the wilderness

I recently stumbled upon a blog called Catholic Phoenix that I really enjoy. It has lots of eloquent, thought-provoking contributors who write on everything from liturgy to poetry to teenagers to philosophy. And they're funny! You can't beat that. Anyway, I recommend this post on the Lenten longing for Easter. The author tells us how, after converting to Catholicism, he followed the older tradition of fasting the duration of Lent, which left him....hungry. Literally. And this hunger underscored everything he did for 40 long days. He writes

Penance during Lent seems to be the way that we submit to that [cleansing] purgative fire. Or rather, it is the way that we embrace it. We simply don’t get to the glorious promise of Easter until we have suffered, because the triumph of Easter was obtained only through Christ’s suffering. Indeed, His voluntary suffering. Fasting is difficult not only because constant hunger taxes our bodies. Fasting is difficult because it requires us to voluntarily suffer; we must choose to be hungry. In Practice in Christianity, Søren Kierkegaard (writing under the pseudonym Anti-Climacus) argues that Christian suffering is Christian precisely because it’s avoidable. All who suffer because of Christ could quit their suffering by quitting Christ. But those who subject themselves to suffering subject themselves to Christ, who is our ultimate example of voluntarily suffering. With imitation in mind, Christians strangely fight the impulse to flee the burning house. Christians instead walk headlong into the blaze, hoping that their loved ones are somewhere nearby, consumed by flames.

The sentiment reminds me of an absolutely breathtaking meditation on Jesus' seven last words from the cross called Death on a Friday Afternoon. I think I reread it every Lent, and each time I'm struck by the beauty and humility and sacrifice and love of our Lord, magnified and intensified under the lens of Father Neuhaus' incomparable way with words. Neuhaus urges readers to enjoy his book slowly, consciously digesting the implications of what happened on that Friday afternoon, rather than rushing headlong into Easter. It's so easy to just survive Lent, quietly checking off the boxes labeled "fasting" and "abstinence" and "prayer" without spending time savoring the taste of sacrifice while we hunger for our reward.

“Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.” (Mt. 4:1) “If you are the son of God,” said the tempter, “command these stones to become loaves of bread.” (Mt. 4:3) Though “he was hungry,” Christ refused. Do you refuse? Or do you turn your stones into bread? Do you even have the courage to wander into the wilderness in the first place?

 Please say a prayer for me that I'll have the courage, and I'll say one for you.

Food for Thought, on a Meat-Less Friday

• "Detachment is supposed to be painful." 
• "Detachment from things gives us the freedom we need to follow Christ.  Goods are only the means." 
• "Less is more. Everything added to Jesus dilutes him."

Mmmmmm Dispensation....

Rejoice meat-loving, practicing Catholics!

Turns out the Solemnity of St. Joseph falls on a Friday this year (next Friday, to be exact) as the blogger over at Whispers in the Loggia is quick to point out. So, thanks to Canon 1251, which says that "abstinence from meat is to be observed... unless a solemnity should fall on a Friday," looks like we can all celebrate St. Joseph the way he was meant to be: with a steak.

If you're stuck for some culinary ways to rejoice (with or without meat), check out this post over at Catholic Cuisine. Scroll down to find the recipes for St. Joseph and enjoy!

Thy Will Be Done, or Multiple Things I've Been Meaning to Post About

..It wasn’t the Lord’s path for me and I have no regrets.

If only we could all be so trusting and selfless! 


Read Kristin Holum's, now Sister Catherine's, story here.

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As my brother-in-law said, "Meat always tastes best on Fridays."

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Hmmm, considering forwarding this to all the friends and family inquiring about when I'll be returning to work...

"The president of the Pontifical Council for the Family, Cardinal Ennio Antonelli, has highlighted the importance of a mother in the home caring for her family and has suggested economic compensation or tax reductions for those women who choose to do this... He observed, 'The self-realization sought by the woman in a job, in a career, in social success has as a cost the renouncement of the marriage and children.' "

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I can't help but see a connection between these two quotations:

“The human person is a being which does not become itself automatically. Nor does it do so simply by letting itself be carried along and surrendering to the natural gravitational pull of a kind of vegetative life. It becomes itself always and only by struggling against the tendency simply to vegetate and by dint of discipline that is able to rise above the pressures of routine and to liberate the self from the compulsions of utilitarian goals and instincts.” Pope Benedict XVI

"For two of the most perfect and powerful means to becoming a saint are Eucharistic adoration and frequent Holy Communion - not because they are liturgically correct, and not because they are psychologically useful, but because Jesus Christ the saint-maker is present in the Eucharist as He is nowhere else in the world. And wherever He is present, He is active. Even when He waits patiently in the Tabernacle, disguised behind the appearances of a little wafer of bread, He is acting. ('Waiting' is an action too.)"  Peter Kreeft

Let us pray that we can be always active, always struggling against the tendency simply to vegetate.

Some Thoughts..

I was thinking yesterday that being pregnant puts a woman in such a unique position. I think it's really hard to convey to women who haven't ever been pregnant (and to men!) just what it's like. I admit that I used to be more than a little weirded out by the thought that a human being would someday live inside of me. You mean, he just lives in there? And you can't do all of the things you used to do or want to do? And sometimes you can actually feel and SEE him moving? Gross! Ahh, how things and minds change. Anyway, back to the unique position idea. You see, yesterday, after I had written out my Lenten goals, I doubted my success. Father Euteneuer (in the link at the bottom of yesterday's post) warned against an Icarus-like Lenten goal list - quality versus quantity, and such. And I started thinking, Am I really going to go to daily Mass? I certainly have the time, but am I really going to go? Do I actually desire enough to show God my love that I am willing to sacrifice my time every day? Lent always makes me realize how truly selfish I am.

But then another thought struck me - every time I go to Mass, so does my son. Every time I receive Communion, so does my son. Now, I had vaguely thought about this throughout my 7 months of pregnancy, thinking of it more as something the two of us shared than anything else. But yesterday I realized that, while pregnant, if I don't take my son to Mass, no one else will. Really, no one else can. It is my unique duty at this point in my life to bring my son to God's house. Of course, motherhood itself opens a whole new world of opportunities for a woman, as she steps into a role that a dad or other relative could never fill in quite the same way. And others can pray for him, now and after birth. Once he is born, others can take him to church or tell him about the mysteries of the Rosary, or read him the Gospels. But at this moment in time, if I don't sacrifice and take him to Mass, no one else can. What an incredible and awesome responsibility.

Lenten Links and Lofty Goals

I can hardly believe Lent starts tomorrow! It seems like it was just Thanksgiving, and then Christmas, and then New Year's, and then Valentine's Day...and suddenly, after months of excess and overeating, here we are. I don't know about you, but I'm the kind of person for whom deadlines are a double edged sword - they instill a creeping anxiety in me while simultaneously giving me the slap to the face that helps me get things accomplished. At the risk of sounding crass, Lent is like a term paper deadline for me. The thought that we are going to be celebrating the resurrection of Jesus in a little over 40 days is what I need every year to make me reevaluate the way I live my life and take stock of the material excesses and habits that serve to distance me from God. My plan for this Lenten season is:

- cut out watching any television during the day and to fill that time with prayer and/or daily Mass
- make daily prayer with my husband a priority
- eliminate all joking at others' expense (this applies to two particular people who shall remain nameless at this point) and gossip - actually think about what I say before I say it!
- spend free-reading time reading Catholic literature instead of Sherlock Holmes stories, etc.

So that's the plan. I think that making it "public" (for the 3 people who read this blog) will help me stick to it and achieve the personal conversion that is the heart of Lent. 

And to help you with your Lenten journey, here are some good links and articles I dug up while wasting time on the internet:

We Could All Use a Little More Deprivation
Recommended Reading for Lent
Fr. Euteneuer on Wasting Lent
All Your Lenten Questions Answered
More Lenten Reading
Death on a Friday Afternoon